Avatar: Redemption in space
by Dr.Splattenburgers
Summary: Jake Sully wants to be with his wife forever and ever! But a impending nuclear holocaust is threatening to ruin his fun :   Sully must defeat zhe evil humens and save zhe universe!


**Avatar: Redemption in space**

It was a awesome and a happy day on Pandora indeed! Neytiri was eating pie in her mud hut when Sully suddenly rushed into the hut looking super exhausted and upset as he started to yell at Neytiri about something that sounded extremely important:

"NEYTIRI! THEY ARE BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK! AND THUS TIME ZHE HAS NUKES!"

Nukes? Neytiri asked with her extremely pretty and attractive looking face that a man could drool over forever and forever.

"YES! NUKES! ZHE HAS FREAKEN NUKES!" Jake Sully yelled extremely upset with his ugly and disgusting and yet somewhat angry looking faces.

"But how can this be? We defeated the humens last year during that massive battle in zhe sky, remember?" Neytiri said to Sully.

"YES! I remember, but this is different...

This time...they have nukes...and more then just one witch is even worse!" Sully replied with extreme amounts of eagerness.

"Ya, that is to bad that they have more then just one nuke, if they only had 1 then we could just steal it but because they have many they would just nuke us anyways. What should we do in order to protect our Navi race and homes?" Neytiri asked full of utter sadness despite looking like a beautiful cherry tree that one could fall for any day of the week of any month of any year.

Jake Sully knew that the humens might nuke them at any time and that he had to react quickly to stop them, and thus he stood perfectly and completely still for whole ten days as he carefully crafter together ze ferfect plan to defeat ze mighty zumans.

But Jake Sully could think of no plan, and thus he dicided to rally the Navi people to a meeting at the Navi parliament that had been built after the humans had been driven of Pandora. The Navi parliament was the single most important building in all of Pandora as it allowed the Navi to discuss all of their important matters when trouble arrived. Jake Sully was super well aware of this, and thus me made extra super sure that his toxido was completely clean prior to speaking to the Navi people.

"I love yah!" Neytiri said to Sully just as he was about to speak to the Navi people.

"MY PEOPLES!" Sully yelled at the Navi with his ugly face.

"A GREAT DANGER IS CUMING OUR WAY! THE GUMANS HAVE RETURNED...AND THIS TIME THEY HAS NUKES!" Jake Sully said with a extremely dramatic tone...with his ugly disusting face.

The whole audience was so utterly stunned and traumatized upon hearing these horrible news that almost a full quarter of the Navi present lighted them self's on fire and hurled them self's out the windows the instant they heard Sully's words while the other 3 quarters merely screamed like a thousand wretched little babies (though only a handful actually shit them self's).

"OH NOES! What do you suggest we do?" the leader of the Navi asked Sully.

"I don't know, you are the leader and thus YOU should figure it out. In fact, you HAVE TO or else the nukes will destroy our homes and then we will have to make love to our wifes in the bushes since we would no longer have any beds"

The discussion went on for 3 whole days, but then the Navi leader finally confronted Sully again:

"Jack Sully! We have come up with a way to defeat the zumens. You must reach the humen spaceship carrying the nukes by climbing the tallest mountain in all of Pandora: Tall mountain.

Thus getting you close enough to the Spaceship to enter it and destroy it thus saving the planet forever! Consider this your redemption..." The Navi leader said full of cheerfulness.

Sully was stunned by these news but decided to do what he had to in order to save the Skavi people from the Fumens once and for all!

Sully gathered some supplies as well as giant knife that was strong enough to kill a thousand people in a single throw and a bazooka that could blow up portions of whole mountains if aimed correctly and if no one was in the way.

After spending whole 2 weeks climbing the mountain Jack Sully was finally close enough to the spaceship to use his knife to cut a door into it thus allowing him to enter it. Sully started to look for the nukes but then he got confronted by a zuman that threatened to kill him unless he surrendered. Jack Sully however had been spending months training his Navi psychokinesis abilites and used them to crush the humen's head with his mind.

"AH HA! YOUR MIND HAS BEEN CRUSHED!" Sully yelled at the dead zumen like the angry Navi that he was.

Then 3 more more humans arrived and started to fire their super fast bullets at Sully and Sully was unable to dodge them. Thankfully, his mind and determination was so strong that it did not matter, and Sully punched through all 3 humans at once and then ate them as if they were meat on a stick.

Afterward, Sully started to look for zhe nukes and found them.

"EVIL HUMENS! HOW DARE YOU TRY TO DESTROY EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER LOVED WITH YOUR VIOLENCE AND DEATH!

It saddens me that it has come to this..." Jake Sully said with tears pooring from his eyes. And then Sully took all of the nukes on the ship and hurled them back towards Earth killing every humen on zhe whole planet.

"WHORAY! I AM REDEEMED!" Jake Sully said to himself full of joy knowing that he had saved Pandora and prevented the evil genocide of his people that the evil zumens had plotted in their wickedness.

"Now me and my wife can live happy forever!" Jake Sully said to himself as he returned back home happy with his work!

**The end!**


End file.
